Of all my kids, I found it hardest to write a thankful post about my eldest. Partly because she was rather rebellious during the last 4 years in secondary school, and partly because she speaks what she feels and doesn’t mince her words. Sometimes she comes across as being too brutally honest for me to accept, and sometimes, speaking to her is like speaking to a porcupine.
During those difficult years, I usually left her room bordering between feeling like I have failed as a parent and wondering why I had such an insolent child.
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| Comfort on big sis’s shoulder |
This year, I can see a change in her. She is more caring towards her younger siblings, and family has taken on a greater significance for her.
Throughout the teenage years, friends were very important to her, and she wasn’t very close to the other kids. She was busy with school and her own schedule and when we went out as a family, she found them too noisy and pesky.
She is more sensible now and I can go to her for her opinions which are well deliberated and usually sound. In fact, I love our chats as I gain a different perspective on issues from her youthful viewpoint.
During the holidays, she took #5 for a day out and allowed him to choose wherever he wished to go. He decided on the Lego cafe because he could eat fish and chips and spend the whole afternoon playing Lego. He came home elated.
I can also count on her to help me pick Kate up from preschool if I can’t make it. She has been such a dear to readily accept such responsibilities.
We’ve found that she has a soft spot for the vulnerable, such as the elderly, disabled children, or abandoned animals. Once, she saw a stray dog which looked rather sickly, and she packed some food and went hunting for the dog.
Whenever I share with them my plans for our next volunteer activity, she never fails to respond enthusiastically, which sets the tone for the younger ones, who may not be that keen.
She has also been indispensable in helping me with the technical side of the blog, for setting it up, and advising me on ways to improve my non-existent photo skills.
During our recent family photo shoot, she took charge of the outfits and zipped around the mall to find coordinating colours for all of us. She even drew 8 stick figures on her phone, and colored one by one in when she found a suitable piece so that the colours wouldn’t clash.
I have never felt old but that day, it hit me that I don’t have the energy level like before, and I have to admit there are things my kids can handle much better than me, with their vigour. Time to gradually hand over the reins!
Most of all, I still appreciate her objectivity, for voicing out what she believes in, and thankfully, she has learnt to moderate her comments while keeping her honesty.
“He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has” – Epictetus
Thankfulā¦ for the hub’s cooking
~ www.mummyweeblog.com – a blog on parenting 6 kids in Singapore ~
